So long and thanks for all the.....fish?

Dearest of lovlies,

As you know, Sister Mary is not tech savvy at all. (GASP!)  SO on a recent trip to Ibizia or was Rome, I recently or shall I say scandously converted a man to take over tech side of things for me.  And well.....it’s been most extravagant.

So if you’re a long time follower, or just stumbling upon this now, I’m moving on over to Wordpress.

My new link is: https://sistermarysschoolof.fashion.blog

Give me a little follow over there, pass it on and for the love of all that is good in the world, stay fabulous!

SM

Circus McGurkus

“And, now, come to this spot
Where the spotlight is hot
And you'll see in the spotlight
A Juggling Jott
Who can juggle some stuff
You might think he could not...
Such as twenty-two question marks,
Which is a lot.
Also forty-four commas
And, also, one dot!
That's the kind of Circus McGurkus I've got!”
― Dr. Seuss, If I Ran the Circus 


Well Lovelies, summer came and went and with it should have gone pantsuits.  I'm not talking the proper pant suit.  I'm speaking of those that our mothers back in the 1970's may have worn and anyone who may have frequented Studio 54 back in "the day" may have sported.  That said, I must offer a caveat, there are SOME pantsuits of that nature that are simply elegant and understated.  This example that I will give you is not.  There are some fashion pantsuits that when paired with the right updo, jewelry and shoes would be a very elegant moment, brace yourself because this is not one of those.

I am simply NOT sure what the statement this person is trying to make other than this may be a failed audition tape from "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert." Or maybe this picture was taken on the set of Priscilla and she's an extra.  I kept thinking that maybe in that large oversized handbag (also a major fashion fail) would be a CD player or MP3 thing playing "Shake Your Groove Thing" because that is the only thing that could save that outfit right now.  But I confess, I'm not positive that anything could actually "save" this outfit...not even if it were on fire and a hunky fireman offered to reach in and grab it from my burning closet.  WHICH by the way would not happen because it would not be in my closet in the first place!  Now the hunky fireman on the other hand...

Or perhaps she just arrived to this event via a clown car?  She may be the one clown that didn't fit into the VW bug.  We will never know, but we can hope that we never see such a bad example of a possible classic look.

All that said, I will give you a classic example of a pantsuit.

Tasteful, chic, and not at all circus like.  This outfit does not scream P.T Barnum or reek of clown essence.  This is the quintessential classic and tailored look!  Coco Chanel and Ralph Lauren would be proud!

Stay fashionable my lovelies!

SM

Alive and Fashionably well

Hello my lovelies!

I am alive and fashionably well!

But that doesn't mean there has not been sins of a fashionable nature committed in my absence. 

Sister Mary had to take some time off to travel a bit.  A trip to Florida in the spring just rejuvenated my soul! 

There have been so many fashion sins, I don't even know where to begin as of late.

So let me take a few moments and I will collect my thoughts and send to you the most recent fashion don'ts on my list.  No one is safe!

Until then, stay fashionable!
SM

The bold and the not so beautiful.....

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“Why not wear mismatching shoes? Who says we can’t? I was just having fun.  For me, fashion is all about fantasy and putting unlikely things together. That’s what I love. I genuinely love dressing up.” ~Helena Bonham Carter

Well Ms. Carter, You alone are a definite fashion “don’t” and I’m not quite sure why I’ve included you in my postings, aside from the fact, you are touching on a new trend in fashion at the moment.  I have read that mismatched patterns are the trend in fashion right now.  While I don't consider myself to be one who really keeps up with such things, now that I saw it, I'm wondering, do I dare?

Honestly, it really bothered me.  I like fashion to have a reason. I don't always like matchy matchy per se, but I definitely like there to be deliberate choices to my clothing styles, or for people to look at me and think “Wow.”  Yes, Sister Mary just broke several of the deadly sins there…Vanity and Ego.  I’ll go confess to Father Theo later, I promise.  When getting ready to leave the convent for the day, I find myself adding a pop of random color but I want it to make sense, I want it to be bold without making me look like a deranged mental patient on the loose at fashion week.

We are seeing it everywhere from mismatched printed tops and pants, to skirts, dresses and tights.  I’m told its definitely a fashion-forward look right now, however with that said, it can also be a very difficult look to pull off.  My first words of advice here is if you absolute MUST try this trend, do stick to the same color scheme. 

My latest fashion victim attempted an abstract patterned dress with argyle tights.  Now, Sister Mary isn’t one to throw stones, she’ll just throw fashion advice and hope it sticks.  But this outfit is the holy trinity of fashion sins; each piece of this outfit on it’s own is lovely, I’m a huge proponent of fashionable tights, but paired with a patterned dress, is a definite no-no.  The message being sent here is one of “I got dressed in the dark,” or “I'm in the middle of doing laundry and I hope you don’t really notice what I’m wearing.”  Dear Readers, this look is just not a good one, and don’t even get me started on the shoes!  Shoes that fit are ever so important, and I don’t care if they are your best Louboutin’s or not…they MUST fit properly and you shouldn’t ever schlump.  But back to the offending outfit; this is a train wreck.  I don’t think I’d have quite the trouble with it except for the fact it is two very bold and dominating prints.  If the tights were instead, a subtle black herringbone pattern or hounds tooth, I think this outfit would not be on my blog, but on my body parading about town as I went about my business for the day.  Let’s just say the wearer of this outfit went into the closet and the clothes came out the dominating winner, and NOT in a good way!

With all that said, I've a few tips for the "If you must attempt this trend."  Floral and stripes are always a good combo. Because stripes are a simple yet strong print, they really go with anything, much like polka dots.  (And you know how Sister Mary LOVES her polka dots!)  However, they have more structure to them making them easy to match with another print that does not have much structure, like for example, a floral print top.  Floral prints are usually not in a straight line or a structured pattern, thus, you get your mismatched prints in an ensemble, but there is still some sort of structure.  However, too much floral and you end up looking like my Grandmother’s chintz wallpaper in the front parlor.  

Try to avoid wearing two types of animal print. This is too chaotic and it will look like you’ve crawled right out of the Cat House at the Zoo!  Get it Cat House?  Women’s fashion?  Darlings, Sister Mary is on a roll today!  

With all that said, I'm going to give this trend an overall fashion "don't" rating and leave this one on the runway, or wherever it was found.  

Until next time, stay fashionable!

 SM

Sarong or Sa-right?

Historically a sarong or sarung is a large tube or length of fabric, often wrapped around the waist and worn by men and women throughout much of South Asia, Southeast Asia, the Arabian Peninsula, the Horn of Africa, and on many Pacific islands. The fabric most often has woven plaid or checkered patterns, or may be brightly colored by means of batik or ikat dyeing. Many modern sarongs also have printed designs, often depicting animals or plants.

Or more modernly it is worn over a swimsuit when one is at the beach and on Spring Break.  It is not traditional to wear one to work over a pair of brightly colored chinos, boots and a twinset.  I say this with explicit caution as Sister Mary was unable to attend fashion week this year due to an unforeseen and truly unfashionable obligation at the convent.  

If you take a sarong out of it's traditional environment and try to modernize it or even add an urban chic spin, one typically ends up looking like a hot mess without the margarita refresher.  When one does decide to wear it over a pair of jeans one ends up accentuating the hips and looking freakishly like an out of place matador.   Ladies, there is a reason we stopped wearing hip rolls, bustles and hoop skirts and this, quite possibly, is it.  There is also a reason NOT to wear a sarong over your chinos, not only is it bunchy and unflattering, but it makes everyone else wonder a few things - did you split your pants?  Or did you have an accident of some sort?  Perhaps you spilled your morning maccachino in your lap or sat in gum?  Are you trying to hide the evilness of VPL?

You could try to convince me of this fashion trend in June or July over a pair of capris, a flowing blouse and some strappy gladiator sandals, but this is a definite fashion don't for March.  But even in the warmer months, if this is not well executed, I may shout "AHOY MATEY" and force you to walk the plank.

I would say this sarong is definitely Sa-Wrong!

Until next time, stay fashionable my lovelies!
SM

Rawr!

One of the quickest ways to add a pinch of personality to any outfit is to mix in a pair of leopard print shoes.  But darlings, as popular and fun as they are, leopard prints don't really work with everything.  In fact, I have seen more fashion train wrecks that begin with a simple pair of leopard print shoes.  This most recent example I found at a coffee shop and is definitely one of those fashion don’t you dares! 

Grey tights as these are should NEVER be paired with anything other than a simple neutral shoe.  I love these shoes, but NOT the hosiery.  Grey and leopard should never go together unless I've found myself reincarnated as a leopard myself and then and only then is it acceptable for a leopard to go grey; and by grey, I don’t mean 50 Shades, unless it refers to the fact I’ve stopped dying my hair!  (GASP!)  Basically the reason this doesn't work is I found myself staring at the yellow leopard shoes that were paired with an overall quietly neutral gray and blue business casual outfit.  If these shoes had been blue suede or black with a bit of bling, I would have left her and her shoes alone.  But alas, I cannot dear reader and remain true to you.

The fabulous news is, when paired in the right combination, it certainly makes a statement for drama, glamour and sex appeal.  (GASP! Sister Mary said sex.)

After black, the easiest shades to pair with leopard print shoes are white and light neutral colors like sand, blush, and cream.  But ladies, this does NOT apply to hosiery.   Hosiery should be kept to nude or black and certainly NOT grey!

Ladies, whether it's flats, pumps, or booties (EW!!  EW!!  Booties are another fashion no no that I will save for later) you're talking about; one of the absolute easiest ways to wear leopard print shoes is to pair them with good old denim.  Familiarize yourself with Mr. Levi Strauss and company. 

Until next time, stay fashionable!

SM

Alas, Poor Yorick...

Poor Yorick, I will not admit I know you Horatio!  That being said, poor us!!  Everything old is new again apparently. 

Today's topic is bubble skirts.  Once popular in the mid-80's as part of the pop culture fashion.  But what we don't realize is that this fashion trend stems from the Renaissance, only then it was for well to do men in Venice, Italy.

This once fashion forward garment stems mostly out of necessity.  Venice was known to flood, so men in that time would wear the shorter pants and taller boots.  Not because it was wickedly fashionable or popular with the ladies, but because they wanted to keep dry.   Nothing says party foul like showing up to court to woo the women in a wet tunic.  Venetians today merely sport their Wellies and foul weather gear when the streets begin to take on water and use the modern convenience of a washer and dryer when their clothes get wet and/or dirty.

Bubble skirts today have taken on a new life in women's fashion. Ladies today can wear them with wildly loud tights and a pair of simple flats.  This once testosterone oriented garment is now taken over by the ladies.  However this is a simple garment that can go wrong quickly.  Too many accessories and you begin to look like you belong in the 80's; too few and you're considered boring.  To be honest, I have never seen anyone successfully pull of looking fabulous in one of these.  I tend to see people looking very bottom heavy or their body type is not one that could support a bubble skirt as acceptable fashion.  I'm not saying one must be waif thin and twelve to wear one, but I do think that anyone past the age of 18 should not be found wearing one, unless of course you find yourself in the streets of a flooded Venice and you are wearing tall boots and a cape. 

So find that happy medium and don't let anyone burst your bubble! Remember this is a fashion maybe, but must be age and accessory appropriate!

Stay fashionable!

SM

Dashiki? Dash-icky!!!

Dashiki's were popular back in the 1970's when roller disco, car washes and sky high platform heels were simply groovy!

However it is now the 21st century, and perhaps the dashiki should take a back seat to other fashions.  Perhaps not?  You can be the judge.

Traditionally, the dashiki is a colorful men's garment widely worn in West Africa that covers the top half of the body.  It has formal and informal versions and varies from simple draped clothing to fully tailored suits. A common form is a loose-fitting pullover garment, with an ornate V-shaped collar, and tailored and embroidered neck and sleeve lines. The colors represent different stages in one's life.

What I'm saying here, dear reader, is nothing more than maybe the wearer of this traditional garment should have thought twice before stepping out in the world wearing this colorful ensemble.  I mean just because it matches your sneakers, does not mean that it is socially acceptable.  I don't know if this young man has been to Africa or if it was a gift.  Either way, I'm not terribly sure that this garment sends the correct message to his audience.

Given the traditional meaning of the dashiki, I'm not even sure what stage of his life this young man is at and trying to represent other than a major fashion don't.  However, that being said, perhaps the stage of life this young man is choosing to represent is the "I'm not quite ripe yet" stage.  Here he is a mind ready to mold into fashion forwardness and he chooses to wear a dashiki; there may be no hope for the fashionable future if this continues.

Until next time, stay classy my lovelies!
SM

Evil Christian Louboutin

I bet you thought Sister Mary had gone inactive.  Well I had, I had to attend to this little thing called "life" for a bit.  But in the meantime, Sister Mary has been collecting images of fashion gone wrong.

I think even Christian Louboutin would cringe at this prospect. 

 Louboutin had it correct, the shoes should leave you wanting more, thus his trademark "red soles."  Now these shoes are making me want less.  Certainly every woman needs a splash of color but this looks like she tromped through day-glo zombie debris on her way to the gallery opening.  A shoe should definitely make a statement and this one should have been "leave it on the rack at Macy's."

While chunky heels are in, one should accentuate the look not take away from it and these shoes certainly add NOTHING to her already questionable dress and boho scarf. 

Well lovelies, Sister Mary has plenty to post from her travels, and until then, stay fashionable.

SM

Mirror, mirror...

"We are family, I've got all my sisters with me..." ~ Sister Sledge.

Now readers you know that even in the most awkward of family photos, one should not even consider dressing alike and that is in the privacy of a photo studio. 

Now if you're going out in public, one should never ever consider dressing alike, and I don't care if it IS a bachelorette party, or as our friends across the pond say "a hen party."

Seriously ladies.  Does not one of you have an original thought between you? This does not bode well for the next generation of feminism.  The only things original about you are your shoes, and even those, well, are questionable.  They are certainly not sensible for traipsing around the city.  I hope you have plenty of Epsom salt and lamb's wool for those blisters.

If there is a wedding in your future, please consider original dress and not conform to the masses.  It's bad enough one must wear a dress with a bow on your bum at the ceremony.

Until then my lovelies, stay fashionable.
SM

Make Art, don't wear it.

Art produces ugly things which frequently become more beautiful with time. Fashion, on the other hand, produces beautiful things which always become ugly with time.
Jean Cocteau


Recently Sister Mary had the fortunate, or rather unfortunate experience at a black tie event.  For my evening out I chose a conservative  little black dress and my grandmother's pearls for accent.  Needless to say it was timeless and picture perfect.  NOW, what I observed at this gala was not.  I should make a point also focus on fashion "do's" but there were so many "don'ts" I wasn't sure where to begin. 

I quote Julie Andrews, "let's start at the very beginning...."

Please ladies when getting dressed for a fabulous night out, do not compete with the subject matter.  Ie.  if the event is about art, or supporting the arts, you do not need to WEAR art.

 Perhaps the boots put it over the top?  Perhaps not.  The world may never know....but you dear readers WILL.


Until my next post, stay fashionable!
SM

 

Inspiration

Dear readers,

There's this little event called ArtPrize, and I've discovered this wonderful blog.  It's what Sister Mary only wishes she could be!

Do check it out!

ArtPrize Worst

Stay fashionable!

SM

Felicia Day

Oh my lovelies,

I've been tied up in prayer and trying to survive the aftermath of Fashion week.  I saw this on twitter awhile back now.

To quote Felicia Day, "It's SO 2005 to have your thong sticking out of your jeans!"

And with that lovely image.....

Stay fashionable!

SM

Continental Divide

The South shall rise again, but not in this picture!

 Please note if you are going to wear a flouncy top, it is in your best interest to see that your *ahem* Continental Divide isn't showing.  Sister Mary fully understands that low rise jeans are in fashion, but there is a time and place and modesty level we should consider.  This is a definite fashion don't.  I wish I could have gotten you a full glimpse at this outfit, the flouncy top, the flared jeans and shoes that were only appropriate for doing the samba at the Copacabana.  Let's just call her Lola and forget she was a showgirl! 

Ladies, before you get dressed in the morning, think about your presentation of self.   You are a gift after all and should look stunning and fabulous wherever you go!
Is this appropriate for where I'm going?  For instance Samba shoes might  not be appropriate for walking Fido in the dog park and picking up poo. 
What is the weather going to be?  You don't want to get stuck traversing the city in a pair of stilettos in a snowstorm, unless you're "that" kind of girl. 

So until my next fashion emergency, I bid you adieu!

Stay fashionable!

SM.

Just what were we members OF?

"I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members. "
~ Groucho Marx

Dearest lovelies,

I saw one of these in a window display of Macy's the other day and I tell you I about fell over on Michigan Ave.  So I HAD to go into the store.  Readers, I will NOT divulge to you what I paid for it "back in they day," but Macy's was asking $59.50.  I about died.  What's worse is I saw it again at Urban Outfitters for $88.00.  


Now, I shall reveal to you what it is I've been just in upheaval about.    It is a Member's Only Jacket.

I am tired of reminiscing, but I am also tired of seeing repeats of fashions that just didn't work the first time around.  Next thing you know we'll be seeing plexiglass shoes with a place to keep your goldfish in the heel.   Which by the way is another bad idea.  I think I'll just go ahead and alert PETA on that one. 

This jacket was stylish at the time, but even then it was a bit questionable.  I mean really, is there a point to the having your neck cinched shut?  You are not climbing Everest and I don't expect this to be any form of a technical jacket.  If it were, it wouldn't leak.  

With that dear reader, I leave you with this as a "fashion don't you dare!"  I could think of better things to become a member of.  

Until later my lovelies, stay fashionable!

Sister Mary

Coco Chanel would never approve.

"Do you know, Mr. Hopper, dear Agatha and I are so much interested in Australia. It must be so pretty with all the dear little kangaroos flying about. Agatha has found it on the map. What a curious shape it is! Just like a large packing case."

- Duchess of Berwick to Mr Hopper. LadyWindermere's Fan, act 2.

Now, back in "the day" these shoes were popular.  WHY they are making a comeback is beyond me!  Kangaroos were designed by American architect and jogging enthusiast Bob Gamm.  Gamm was a running enthusiast who would go ten kilometers a day, but preferred light athletic clothes without pockets.  He designed the sneakers for his own personal use as a place to store his keys and money, then marketed them effectively. His marketing design was successful, leading to sales in excess of 700,000 pairs a month by the early 1980s.  But really, they were notable for having a small zippered pocket on the side of the shoe, large enough for a small amount of loose change, keys, or more recently, condoms.

On a more serious note, once you got your change or personal item into the pocket, you had a slim to none chance of getting it back out without the removal of the shoe.  I remember trying to get my twenty five cents out of the pocket so I could successfully make a telephone call.  Yes, dear readers, Sister Mary owned a pair.  I distinctly remember standing in the phone booth wrestling with my shoe and trying to get the change out of it without losing my calm, cool, collected self.  

Readers, if you insist on having pumped up kicks like all the other kids, these are NOT for you.  These shoes are strictly for nostalgia purposes and nothing more.  Consider picking up a different pair, and leave these 'roos to forever roam the Australian Outback.

Until later my lovelies, stay fashionable!

Sister Mary

I found Nemo!

Dear readers,

I should precursor this entry with the fact this woman was SO kind to me on the bus, it's almost unfortunate that I must include her in my blog.   But I would not be Sister Mary if I did not include her. Now, before you continue reading, do note that the only appropriate place this dazzling and daring ensam would be acceptable attire to is the aquarium; to which we were both going.

There is is.  There's my caveat on this entry and without further ado....

Until later my lovelies, stay fashionable!

Sister Mary

Petrifying in Pink

My humble reader, I quote to you now from the movie, "Pretty in Pink" circa 1986.  Duckie says to Andy, "This is a really volcanic ensemble you're wearing."

This next outfit is nothing near that. In fact if I were to use the term "volcanic" it would mean it should be buried like the lost city of Pompeii. (Too harsh? I think not. You decide.)




The coloring is perfect for spring, but the cougar like heels that were barely walkable and the tight pants also preventing movement were a bit much. But the Pièce de résistance, was the blouse with the zipper up the back and the baby buggy she was pushing. My only regret was not getting a front view of this daring ensemble!




Until later my lovelies, stay fashionable!




Sister Mary.

Shoes.

Please dear reader, consider your footwear for the day when getting dressed in the morning.  I am going to be brave and say that platform cork heels went out with Disco and the 70's.   Black balloon shorts or kulots should have stayed in the Renaissance or we should only see them worn on those reciting Shakespearean soliloquies.  Needless to say this in Sister Mary's book is a definite fashion DON'T.

Welcome!

If you've found my blog, welcome!  Bienvenidos, Welkom, Velkommen, Aloha, and G' Day!

Occasionally we walk down the street, do a double take and think "Wow!  Did they look in the mirror before leaving the house?"  I'm here to help prevent that problem! 

I will show you both Fashion Do's and the more common Fashion Don't. 

Keep coming back for more updates and in the words of my personal hero, Coco Chanel, "I like fashion to go down to the street, but I can't accept that it should originate there."